I Am Said I (Huruma)

There is an invisible Baseball bat Hard-hitting You wield it well Beating down The hidden heart Disabling every part Of who I am Reaching out To strike my soul But it's not yours To touch

I'm on the tracks You drive the train It was my fault I hurt you But was it prayer That inspired My humiliation? This devastating Scrutiny Your sworded tongue Thrust into the marrow Dismantling my credibility? And when you Have relieved yourself All over me You sit there Smiling In the aftermath As only a certain Kind of woman can Surprised By my pain

Glencairn Abbey Gates fascinate me. There is something in them like a calling. A thrill runs through my whole being in attentive moments when I'm alert and pass by a gate. It reminds me of the Song of Songs when the Beloved comes to the garden gate - "...my heart was thrilled within me." (Songs 5:4) It's as if every ordinary gate is a prophecy of THE Gate that I must pass through. This morning as I was walking towards the sea I felt the sensation, the thrill as I passed by a particular gate and I found myself asking God for THE Gate, to bring me to it. I don't know what THE Gate is or what it really means in concrete reality. I could guess but I don't know how or when it will reveal itself. Anyway when I got back in home I picked up the Magnificat for morning prayer and was surprised, astonished to read all of the following which I find very consoling: Today your gate stands open, And all who enter in Shall find a Father's...

I can get up at eight And not be late If I stay in bed Till ten or twelve And I can meditate Whenever the Spirit Moves me

I do not want To empathize With lies To be sucked Into false emotion However sad It is wasted Energy Draining the age That is left to us We're too old For that now Almost too late For you to shed The disguise But we have to Hope in the Truth That sets us free

Immersed In Mercy During a retreat in the Camaldolese monastery near Frascati in 1839 St. Vincent Pallotti wrote that he was in extreme need of what he calls an “infinite deluge of divine mercy” and he says “I found myself immersed in an immense sea of divine Mercy”. The need and the experience of Mercy was vast and abundant. To describe God Pallotti uses words such as infinite, immeasurable, incomprehensible. God is immense, infinite, immeasurable and incomprehensible Mercy. They are powerful images – being washed in the deluge, being immersed in the sea and finding oneself. It is when I am so overwhelmed, immersed in God that I find my true self, who I truly am and who I am called to become. What matters in this immersion is that I become an altogether new creation (Galations 6:15). It matters that I keep striving for this and not settle for less. I love to stand on a cliff on Inis Mor in the Aran Islands and look out at the expanse of the Atlantic Ocean. It reminds me of God, the Me...

I am a whale In a fish tank No room to move Not able to breathe No means of escape Prisoner to your desire To possess And you think It's quite acceptable Not having the sense To know that If you cling to me You will lose me If you let me go There's a chance That I'll remain